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A Gaggle of Lesbians

A Gaggle of Lesbians

In my 61 years I have learned many things and have some good old-fashioned common sense. Send your questions to Eleanor@epochalips.com.

Dear Battleaxe,

I need help finding the perfect bra, I can never find anything that is comfortable. Am I the only one who hates the underwire bras? —Uncomfortable in Utica.

Dear Uncomfortable,

No, you are not. I HATE underwire bras! I can never understand how people wear them. Whenever I have worn them the underwire always pops out and starts poking me. Now, if I was lost in the woods or on a desert island, I would find that handy and use it to spear fish or as a hook to rattle a tree for some wild hickory nuts. Since I am not in either of those places, I would prefer a comfortable bra. I sometimes use sports bras or I do buy the Wacoal bras. Go to Macys or Nordstroms and have one of the sales gals help you, It really does make a difference…especially when they stick their fingers in your cup to get the ultimate fit. You just, might keep going back there!

Dear Battleaxe,

When I watch celebrities on television, I see that they all have entourages. How does that happen? I’ve actually seen that with regular people too. Do you have to be famous to have an entourage? I guess what I’m saying is, I want a gaggle of lesbians, hailing a cab for me or getting my drink. How can I do that?
—Desiring what the rich and famous have.

Dear Desirous,

Hmmmmm, can I get back to you on that?

Dear Battleaxe,

I was cleaning up in my gf’s office in our home, as I picked up some papers that were definitely trash, I hit the mouse and that brought up the screen and I could see her emails. One stood out to me as it had the subject title, “When can I see you again?” I froze and really thought of reading it as I could see that it had been opened and she would never know that I read it. I just walked out but it is really killing me. Is she cheating on me?
—Not feeling good about this.

Dear not feeling good, aka Snoopy,

Why are you cleaning her office? It’s HER office. You did the right thing by walking away, all actions have consequences and unless you are ready to face what you may have read, I say stay away. That email could have been from anyone, her doctor, her therapist, a long last friend, a relative you may not know about. If you have reason to believe she is not faithful, I say you need to talk, not snoop.

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One comment

  • Alicia Orozco says:

    I loved the question/answer on the underwire bra. I feel the same way…HATE THEM….right now the one I have on is pocking me. I will look up the one you recommend at Macy’s or Norstrom. Saludos, Ali