Lesbian relationship expert Dr. Glenda Corwin gives practical advice for lesbian couples to help unpack frustrating dynamics in their communication. Dear Dr. Corwin: “We need to communicate better! We love each other, and talk all the time, but we never seem to get anywhere except mad… same old issues, no progress. Can you help?” Recently […]
Dear Dr. Glenda: My partner and I are arguing a lot about our sex life. We don’t really have one, except maybe a couple times in the past year. She thinks we should work on this, but when I talk to my friends they aren’t having much sex either. Sex has never been that big […]
Most of us have had the sad opportunity to reflect on how relationships fail. Whether you’re currently in a floundering relationship, or just ended one, or have been single forever because you’re afraid of failing again—at some point you ask yourself “How did we go wrong?” And, even more painfully, “How did I go wrong?” […]
Many years ago a young woman came to my office for consultation about a very specific question. She asked “Do you think lesbian bed death is inevitable?” Her story was sadly familiar. She had been living with her partner for 12 years, the past 5 without sex. She was unhappy about this, but her partner just […]
Recently I listened to a lovely talk about meditation, about paying attention to the present moment, practicing loving compassion, and letting go of thoughts that carry you away from your breath, or mantra, or wherever you focus when you meditate. This makes so much sense. Why is it so hard to practice these guidelines in […]
Let’s talk about celebrating romantic love. Specifically, celebrating what psychologist Dorothy Tennov named “limerence.” This is a state of falling in love, characterized by obsessive thoughts, intense longing, and delirious bliss when thinking of the beloved. New lovers lean into each other, pay passionate attention, adore each other, feel their hearts bursting, and their spirits skipping […]
Before the election, I was writing a response to a question about the ifs, whens, and hows of “casual sex.” A woman planning an Olivia cruise wondered if she could enjoy a shipboard sexual encounter, without dire emotional consequences. It’s a valid question, worth being thoughtful about. But then we had this election, and that […]
Soon after a wonderful woman comes into your life, you may notice a phenomenon unique to our lesbian world. She’s still good friends with her ex-partner, and likes to hang out with her and include her in friend gatherings. We have a lot of mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, it’s wonderful to […]
The key word in this title is “Decide” This is different from “get swept away,” “fall into bed,” “go with the flow,” or other versions of the fantasy that sexual desire just overcomes you and suddenly, spontaneously, there you are! To decide is to be intentional, and responsible, about a significant step in a new […]
Q. My problem with dating is that I don’t know how to end it. Last time I went out with someone, I knew after the first date that I wasn’t attracted to her…but she acted so interested and I didn’t want to hurt her feelings, so I went out with her for several weeks. We […]
Hang on, it’s going to be a wild ride!
— Robin
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